The name...David

This last week of July/first week of August was a difficult one for me.  For some reason I just felt very down and defeated.  Maybe, with the distance of time, I know I am being carried further and further away from my love.  Maybe I am fighting my way out of denial and un-acceptance, emotionally kicking and screaming into the dawn of reality and I HATE IT, who knows.

I'm not a big television person.  I do not turn it on throughout the day until evening, and then it's to sit back and relax and watch the same shows I did with my husband.  Some funny, some repeates, whatever...it's just comfortable and familiar to me.

This week I saw  many shows...Paranormal Witness, Chopped, House Hunters International, Undercover Boss, Big Bang Theory, Rules of Engagement, Hoarders, Long Island Medium, Restraunt Stakeout, Bar Rescue etc etc etc.  Fascinating, right?!?  It's a grande life, but someone has to live it...

Anyway, this past week, this difficult past week, on each show I watched the featured person of each and every show had the name David.  There was not one show I saw that the main person of the episode was not named David...not Dave, but David.  I heard it every time, but it wasn't until part way through the week that I realized it was a sign meant just for me, from the love of my life.  

You see, at the beginning of the week I sat here crying and I picked out a VERY specific thing that, if he made it happen, I would never ever doubt in signs again no matter how small.  If he did this one thing I would forever be a believer.  It has not happened yet.   

We live in the top floor of a VERY old, 1895,  Bell Mansard Victorian, and David used to say he always felt scared to go into our Master closet...the hairs on the back of his neck would stand up every time he went in.  Also, whenever I was away traveling, he and our daughter would say that the old 'post' locks would always be in the 'out' position.  Noone ever really even uses them and to do so you have to physically turn the knob to make the post come out of the door.  For some reason when I am home it doesn't happen, but when I am gone they both swear it ALWAYS happens.  This...this is what I asked of my husband...the sign I wanted to see...make the posts be in the out position like you used to claim.  Do that and I will forever believe.

It has not happened, the posts remain tucked inside the door where they belong...but maybe that is because 'another' has control over that trick...maybe the ghost of the founding owner of this beautiful old home,  who died in his kitchen here on the first floor...knowing this, my husband did the only thing he could think to do and that was to have his name plastered on every single show I watched in a weeks time.  David, David, David, not Dave as he was known by those of his former life, but David as was spoken by me, and those in his new life...his name, David, was spoken every single day inside of this house through the voices of the television.

That's good enough for me...