July 2nd

Another sticky, drizzly, humid day...not helpful for the mood.  I'm also going through another odd phase...I'm finding that I'm feeling very resentful, on your behalp, of all those that hurt you in your life.  The pains we would talk about alone at night so you could get a good nights sleep and wake to a new day.  God David, I miss talking with you, we did it so much and we were so good at it.  How great that we had that.  I guess I need to focus on the maturity and wisdom of our conversations and the conclusions that we reached rather than the who, the what and the why...I love you babe...very deeply.  My heart seems to beat out of rhythm now and it's painful.  I will still talk if you will still listen my love.  send me strength.  xoxo

Went to Applebee's for lunch with GiGi and cried like an itiot for a half an hour...too many date nights at the bar with my boyfriend.  I am never going to get over this baby...

Goodnight my love.  Josh should be here tomorrow and then we will head our of town for a few weeks.  I am going to miss our home and miss our room...I hope you will be with us.  Keep us safe baby.  I love you.